‘It Was Her New York: True Stories & Snapshots’ – C.O. Moed’s memoir hits home

A deeply personal memoir centered around the mother-daughter bond, Claire Olivia Moed’s “It Was Her New York: True Stories & Snapshots” is powerful book is full of grace, humor and an unmistakable New York edge.
A distinctive feature of the book is that Moed blends poetic prose with a series of photographs taken by the author herself as she cares for her aging mother. The accompanying visual narrative adds a layer of interest to this groundbreaking memoir.

But far from simply illustrating the narrative, the photographs create a richer more complex understanding of the sometimes emotionally charged subject matter. The narrative points to parallels between her mother’s deteriorating mental capacity and the gradual slipping away of the old familiar Lower East Side neighborhood as new storefronts appear along with a sea of unfamiliar faces, a casualty of gentrification.

“I wanted to take a picture,” she writes, “to capture one last portrait of my childhood before it disappeared into thin air.”

And yet the essence of the New York we love is still intact. Moed observes that the way people relate to each other has not changed. Whether in a foreign or local accent, she notes the candor with which a taxi driver has told her about his life, “as if he were talking with a neighbor because he is a neighbor. New Yorkers talk to one another like that,” Moed said in an interview with Barney Smith on Story Comic Presents. From a total of 1400 stories, the author crafted 184 pages to create this “snappy novel.”

Author C.O. Moed received the Elizabeth George Grant for Fiction, is an alum of the WOW Cafe, and her writing has been published in the Silver-Tongued Devil Anthology among other places. She has been awarded several prizes for this timely memoir including a Literary Titan Book Award, Outstanding Creator Award for Grief and Coping, and earning praise as a Booklife Editor’s Pick.

Family tales
A Julliard-trained pianist, Florence, the author’s spirited mother, maintained a 60-year relationship with a woman and came out as a lesbian late in life. Interestingly, she met and married a man because that woman urged her to do so. The marriage did not last, but for her it appears to have been the right decision.

“It Was Her New York” contains echoes of the gay memoir “City Boy: My Life in New York During the 1960s and ’70s” (2009) by Edmund White. Both books unflinchingly tell it like it is, and skillfully capture the spirit of New York City.

In addition, Moed overlays the at-times poignant story with that unique self-deprecating Yiddish sense of humor. One of the most shocking examples of their mother-daughter humor that some would call self-debasing is Florence referring to her own late mother who was cremated as “Mom-in-a-Can.”

The strength of Florence’s character comes through, even as dementia overtakes her. In one scene, Florence stands in the street in slightly mismatched clothes arguing with a parking meter she has mistaken for someone she once knew. Moed points out that despite her mental decline, her core personality was very much still intact.

“She was the woman who could rush through her city and her life in that ferocious stride of hers–nothing stopping her, walking for miles and hours to save carfare so she could blow it on the new special at Wendy’s.”

In another memorable late-night scene, Florence sits at her vintage piano, fingers hovered above the keys, but instead of beginning to play, she stares at the sheet music and remains suspended in time as Moed looks on. Moed notes that her apartment, once filled with music, now feels more like a museum slowly being packed away. But thankfully the dominant vibe is peaceful.

These are some of the heartfelt vignettes in this book that skillfully capture the complex emotional truth of caregiving. Anyone who’s walked this path supporting aging loved ones will find this memoir to be of great interest. It’s a tough journey, no doubt, but what an incredible gift to be able to be there for those we love.

“It Was Her New York: True Stories & Snapshots” by C.O. Moed, Rootstock Publishing, $36.
  https://www.rootstockpublishing.com/rootstock-books/p/it-was-her-new-york
  https://www.comoed.net/